I can't sleep. It's not that I have insomnia, it's that I feel like crap. For those who know me, they know I NEVER, EVER, NEVER, EVER, NERVER, never feel like crap. I'm basically a bucket of laughs, a bottle of bubbles, a stick of cotton candy. I'm a very cheerful person. It's just my nature. I'm round and jovial. They call me tons of fun.
So when I come to you like this, at 11:14 pm (so late!), and I tell you that I feel like crap, you must know, instinctively that something is dreadfully wrong. What is wrong is that my spine is on fire and my ear drums are about to implode. Or explode. They're doing both and I have no control of it, as anyone with ears will tell you.
Eustachian tube dysfunction my ass. Well, OK, that must be what it is because I realize my Eustachian tubes are to blame. Where's the Benadryl? I never have any Benadryl when I really need it. I'm not supposed to take it -- a rule imposed by me -- because it turns me into Mr. Hyde the next day. The first day it turns me into a sleepwalker. I'd rather be sleepwalking right now. I wish I had a bumper sticker that read "I'd rather be sleepwalking." It wouldn't be very funny, at least, not as funny as the "I'd rather be goldmining" bumper sticker I once saw. Classic.
The problem is, and I've resigned myself to this, the ears are never going to get better. Apparently the only thing that could really help them is the b.s. allergy shots. Remember the allergy racket post? Turns out, I was right about that! Either the insurance company or the allergist is cheating me. I can't figure out who because they both stick to their stories and their guns and their lies. I tried to strong arm the allergist by sticking to my guns and saying I'd only pay half of the bill they gave me, but they said they don't like that. They don't like that deal.
I haven't the energy to fight back. Is it really worth it? Over what will essentially add up to $140? I have two lawyers in my family, but I seem to have offended one into silence and the other simply told me UHC sucks. So anyway, stupid allergist. I could tell you the whole story but I'm sick of the story. It's exhausted me. Maybe tomorrow. The point is, I'm in the right. So I haven't returned for the allergy shots which aren't really free (there's the rub). I'd have to pay a co-pay every visit! In the long run is it really worth upwards of $2,000? Tonight it feels like it would be. But when this ear-hell episode passes, I'll think otherwise.
Even with all the lies and the cheating and the corruption of insurance companies (bastards!) and the greedy, lying doctors and specialists (bastards!), I still prefer it over socialized health care (commies!).
I just wanted to go one day without passing up the opportunity to use the word commie in a sentence. Sigh. Now I'll be able to sleep.
7 comments:
are u pregs?
that is the first time I've been able to leave a comment on your damn blog. Come on over. You may swear any time your please.
Finally, the great BagLady speaks! You made my day.
H no! NOT pregnant. I spent most of the day Sunday hunched over filling tiny nail holes in a hardwood floor, sanding the edges, and then sanding the wood filler. OR, I just heard on the radio that a bunch of Vanderbilt students were being treated for bacterial meningitis. It could be that...I was in the vicinity of Vandy yesterday....
I love your blog.
$2K would seem a bargain for your malady - in the long run. No treatement is totally free. You either pay exorbitant monthly premiums for your insurance, or you pay higher co-pays. Think of it like this: people pay that amount or more to have laser eye surgery, which is not really a permanent solution, and I have rarely heard of anyone regretting it. If anything is worth the cost, it is one's health, no? At least the cost is spread over time, right?
True. And this treatment is not guaranteed to work, either. Chances are that I'd see no change and end up doing the shots for the rest of my life.
Plus I was assured over and over again that it would be covered by my insurance. They told me there was also no copay. Then, after six weeks of treatment, they gave me a bill. I was being charged a copay, discounted, but still about $19 a visit.
The problem with what happened here, aside from them lying to me, is that there is a cheaper option in light of the copay I was told I would not have to pay. Sublingual drops, which are not covered by insurance. I would pay $150 for three months of drops. It's about $110 cheaper for me to buy the drops. That's $110 the doctor doesn't pocket.
In any case, I'm not against spending money on my healthcare. What bothers me is that I was misled. I understand that it's partially my fault. I should have called the insurance company myself. BUT, I'm new to this. Plus the insurance world is completely baffling and their billing codes are confusing. There's a good chance I would have been told the same thing as what the doctor's office was told. However, the doctor's office had the benefit of knowing their billing codes. I didn't even know about billing codes until I got my bill and tried to figure out what was going on.
I learned a hard lesson, and I won't be going back to THAT doctor. But I won't stop trying to feel better. I think the best solution will be to move back to the desert. I'm convinced that Nashville DOES have more allergens than Utah. Mainly molds. And a variety of different grasses. I love it here, but my body doesn't.
Thanks for the comment.
"Even with all the lies and the cheating and the corruption of insurance companies (bastards!) and the greedy, lying doctors and specialists (bastards!), I still prefer it over socialized health care (commies!)."
Ha! This is brilliant! I grew up with socialised health 'care' and it's pretty inadequate - instead of having to pay out of the ear for the allegy medication, it just wouldn't be available because it's not seen as economically viable for the general public.
I'm a cynical old sod, but moving to America, my experiences of private medical care have actually been a pleasant surprise and show that the National Health Service back home in blighty has a lot to answer for.
French have got it right. It's nationalised health insurance, so you pay 10% or 20% of your costs and the government pays the rest. Much more efficient system than the British 'free' service.
If something's 'free' it's normally worth exactly what you paid for it!
Like your blog a lot!
Thanks for the comment and the compliment! I'm not sure what the French have got going on, but I figure I want the option of NOT paying for insurance. I'm not really sure what the "plan" is, the one that Hillary and others are trying to foist on us, albeit little by little, but I have a feeling it would be like taxes or social security: they'd take the money out of our paychecks before we even see it.
That seems wrong. What about the right not be healthy?
My experiences with insurance and health care have generally been good. I think I'm with a crappy insurance company. UHC sucks! Long live Blue Cross Blue Shield (or so my healthcare lawyer brother-in-law tells me).
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